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Looking Back on the Year

Helen — Tue, 26 Jan 2010 18:43:12 +0000

I got this idea from another blogger. Seems like nice way to look back at my year. I’m thinking of trying to do this every January. I know I’m a little late for reflections of 2009, but here goes anyway:

1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?
I learned to make soap.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

No, I don’t make any actual new year’s resolutions. This year I do hope to get back into better physical shape. I really dropped the ball on fitness in 2009.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Yes, my niece had her third son.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
No, and I’m very grateful for that.

5. What countries did you visit last year?

No travel for me last year, unless you count hops over the line to Bellingham and Seattle. My sister and I did a 2 day road trip to shop in Seattle and it was so much fun. We haven’t had time alone together to reconnect in years and we laughed and cried. I want to do it every year now, at least!

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
A full-time-employed husband. He wants that as much as I do though. Here’s hoping that 2010 brings a great career opportunity for him.

7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
The actual date numbers don’t stick in my mind, but the weekend garage sale I had in March to raise money for the Weekend to End Breast Cancer was crazy. I almost killed myself and Jon too, but we raised $1700 so I consider it a great success:-) The actual weekend walk in August was an amazing experience. The day my daughter surprised me by turning up back home suddenly after being in Calgary for several months. The day that a doctor told me and my mom that she probably had early stage Alzheimer’s Disease. May 1st, the day that me and my family helped my mom move into her new apartment.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Finishing the Weekend to End Breast Cancer walk of 60 km over 2 days, and raising over $2000 for the BC Cancer Foundation.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Neglecting my physical health by avoiding regular exersize.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Nothing serious, thankfully.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
The soaping supplies from a soapmaker who was going out of business. It was an incredible deal and it really got me jump started with my soapmaking!

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My brother’s. He fundraised and then rode his bike over 400km in one day from Kelowna to Delta to raise awareness and money for the Canadian Cancer Society in the Ride 2 Survive. It was an amazing accomplishment.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

I wouldn’t go quite as far as appalled or depressed, but I was pretty irritated with the moderators of a certain soapmakers’ forum for banning me. Get over yourselves, seriously. Your loss

My son gave me a few moments to be appalled about here and there (what teenager doesn’t?) and when he was struggling with anxiety and depression early in the year it was pretty sad for me, but I don’t get depressed easily.

My mom’s ongoing struggles with her memory make me sad. I try not to get depressed over it though, just try to help as much as I can.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Most of it went for just keeping us going day to day, but another large portion went to get me set up for making soap as well.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
I don’t think anything was quite THAT exciting in 2009, but selling nearly $500 in products at one small craft fair I did this fall was exciting for me.

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?
I don’t know that it will stick in my mind for always, but Adam Lambert singing ‘Mad World’ on AI was pretty cool. He made the show fun to watch last year.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? A little sadder.
b) thinner or fatter? Fatter.
c) richer or poorer? poorer (we’re talking money, right?)

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
I’ll say it again- physical activity. Also- wish I’d done more fun things with Jon. Life can get kind of routine at times and we forget to enjoy our time together and just do fun stuff.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Eating. Complaining.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
With my family at our house, we had everyone here for dinner.

21. Did you fall in love in 2009?

No, but I stayed in love.

22. What was your favorite TV program?

Definitely LOST. Can’t wait for it to start again next week. It’s the last season though:-( I also had a lot of fun watching American Idol with my son, Devon. It’s our mom-and-son bonding time. We don’t get much of that anymore so I really enjoy it. Other than that, I don’t really watch TV anymore.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Hate is a very strong word. I don’t have true hate for anyone. There are a few irritating people I try to avoid though.

24. What was the best book you read?
The Time Travelers Wife. Absolutely pulled me in. I didn’t want it to end, but couldn’t stop reading.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
I don’t really discover music. That’s Jon’s area:-)

26. What did you want and get?
A new washer and dryer- front loaders, they rock.

27. What did you want and not get?
A new kitchen. (not expected, but still wanted!)

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
Nothing sticks out in my mind other than Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. I don’t think it was the best of the series but I’m a big HP fan, so I enjoyed it.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 46. Jon took me out for dinner to the Washington Avenue Grill. It was lovely.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
If I could have had the kitchen renovated, or finished all the half-done projects on the house.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
I’m pathetic in this department, as all who know me are aware. I spent most of the year in my jammies working from home, or in my comfy jeans- mainly because I’ve gained weight and don’t feel good about how I look

32. What kept you sane?
Being loved by a wonderful man. Having a hobby that I love. Working from home.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Embarrassingly, Adam Lambert. I know, he’s young enough to be my son and he’s gay but he’s adorable and his voice is incredible *shrug*

I also really admire Brad Pitt for all he does for people in need. That makes him pretty fanciable, and he doesn’t look half bad either, let’s face it .

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
I really wish I were more interested in politics, but I’m just not. It was pretty exciting to see Obama getting inaugurated, for many reasons.

35. Who did you miss?
I missed Jon’s parents, who live in England. I wish we could see them more often. I also missed my dad as always. I can’t believe it’s been 11 years since he died.

36. Who was the best new person you met?

Nobody in particular sticks out in my mind. I guess I don’t meet too many new people.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009.

Make sure the people you love know it, and show them often. You never know when you might not be able to tell them again. (related to my mom’s memory problems)

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

Birthdays Aren’t All Bad…

Helen — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 14:14:41 +0000

…but they feel that way anyway…

Last week was my birthday. I don’t get excited about them anymore. Who wants to be older anyway? (besides my teens that is!) Jon is always sweet and finds a way to do something special for me. This year he gave me a card, inside he listed reasons why he loves me. It is just beautiful and something I will treasure. We went out for dinner too and spoiled ourselves with 3 courses. We don’t do that often, so it was a real treat.

My friend Yvette made my day by having a bouquet of pink roses delivered to me! Wow….somehow flowers just make me feel so loved and appreciated. Maybe because they seem like a decadent gift, something I wouldn’t buy for myself.

My kids, on the other hand, were pretty lame about my birthday this year. I try not to let it bother me, but I wish they could put a bit of effort into it. My son remembered and wished me a happy birthday, and my daughter bought me a generic card. Is it too much to hope for a thoughtful gift? Nothing expensive. Just something that shows they thought about my birthday for more than 15 seconds, you know? They could make me something or clean the house for me, or even bake me a cake— but they just don’t. Some years they do better, but maybe it’s just their ages. They are still so wrapped up in themselves that they don’t think about me much anymore. My daughter spent days on end planning her friend’s birthday party and creating a slideshow video for her…..I got a card (not even a MOM card, just a generic card you could give to someone you work with!) That shows you where I rank on her priority list right now! I’m sure when it’s my son’s girlfriend’s birthday, he’ll be stressing for days about what to get for her. (and asking me to buy it since he has no job!)

I guess that’s why I try to keep myself so busy all the time. I wonder how they would feel if all I did for their birthdays is give them a hug or a card?

A Sad Ending

Helen — Sun, 01 Feb 2009 05:22:00 +0000

I’ve been a member of an email group through Yahoo for several years. I think I joined around 2001. It’s a support group for couples in long distance relationships. Most of us had met our partners over the internet in one way or another. The group is moderated by a couple who live in Australia (her) and Texas (him) Their story was so inspiring to me at the time because they had been having a long distance relationship (LDR, we call it) for a few years by that time. I was in awe of the strength they seemed to have and the fun they would have when they were together. They were determined to keep their relationship strong, despite not knowing if they would ever be able to live together. There were some obstacles and I don’t know all the details-but she had children and he couldn’t travel for some reason. So, she would travel to Texas to visit him whenever she could, and they would share their stories with the rest of us and we would try to comfort them when they were apart.
During all this, my husband Jon and I were having our own LDR. He was in England and I was here in Canada. We knew we would eventually be together, but it was a rough few years before it actually happened. Jon has been here for 5 years now and I’ve stayed on the LDR email group, mainly just to keep in touch with what was going on with the other couples, but also because I wanted to be there if and when the Texas/Australia couple were ever able to become an NDR (near distance relationship:-) I wanted to see their happy ending.
Well, today she sent a message to tell us that after 11 years of their LDR, he passed away yesterday in Texas- just a few days after she had to go back to Australia. He had been quite ill for a few years, but I don’t think anyone can ever be prepared for the end. She is so devastated. My heart is heavy for Carolyn tonight. Rest peacefully Donn.